Columbia-School, Country, or Record Company

For some reason, this was on my mind with the earliest thoughts of the day. The others were some freaky dream that I cannot remember well enough to recount. So let's briefly remind ourselves about each one and pick the best.

Columbia University-an Ivy League School Located in Manhattan, NYC. Probably most noted for its School of Journalism. Although it is distinguished for many other things. Columbia, Like many other universities has fallen under the spell of noisy self-righteousness, I mean protesting. Not content in rooting for our enemies in foreign wars, they also are against law and order here at home. On October 4, 2006 a group of student protesters mounted the stage during a speech Made by A founder of the Minutemen Project. I find their train of thought intriguing. Illegal aliens should be allowed to enter our country at will, but U.S. citizens don't deserve their First Amendment rights when you don't agree with them. Let's hope the future leadears of America don't go to C.U.

Colombia(White Powdery Jewel of South America)- A democratic republic with a stable goverment, yet to be completely hegemenous due to strength of the drug trade. The countries terrain is as diverse as its ethnic makeup. All types are to be found in Colombia. There is also a vibrant urban and rural populations. With a progressive and reform minded government, this country looks to be a part of the Free West, not taking the lead of thugs like Hugo Chavez in Venezuela. Now just stop with the coke please.

Columbia Records- One of the first distributors of Edison phonographs. They obviously got into recording and selling records. They were the first company to introduce the LP. Over the years, Columbia Records has brought us music from Tony Bennett, David Bowie, Alice in Chains, Billy Joel, Mariah Carrey, and Cyndi Lauper. Columbia is now owned by Sony.

My winner is Colombia-the country. With all of its faults, it is at least trying hard to be better. Those snot nosed Ivy Leaugers seem to have forgotten what freedom is. They are more pre-occupied with ivory tower concepts like peace and diversity. Columbia Records is a Japanese company now producing non-musical pop music. Their best days are long gone. Anyone care to disagree, let's hear it!

Thank you Wikipedia.com for your help

Why I am not a Comedian

I like to kid around and make jokes. At one time, I thought telling jokes is what I wanted to do for a living. Maybe I still do. All right I do.However, I have never wanted to be labeled as a comedian. I want to be the guy who tells jokes and is taken seriously. Yeah, I'm screwed up. But that's the way I am and I don't care who knows.
However,I did make a list of tens why I don't want to do stand up comedy.
1) Roasts- telling the same joke about different people.
2)Fat jokes- these are never nice unless you are fat and you tell them about yourself.
3)Begging drunks for laughs- If they need to be sauced to laugh, you aren't very funny.
4)Being even lonelier- I lead a fairly solitary life so far, so being on the road as a one-man act doesn't sound too appealing.
5)Catholic Priest jokes are tired.
6)No boss to mock-this one could go either way, especially now that my sister is my boss.
7)I never want the same job as Kathy Griffin.
8)I can't fart on cue-we have to live with some regrets.
9)I don't want Sportscenter to steal my jokes.
10)Standing in front of a crowd and only telling jokes is stupid.

Kramer and Apologies

If you haven't heard, that guy Kramer (Michael Richards) from Seinfeld is a bad comedian. Oh yeah, he also called two black guys niggers. Why he thought that was funny I'll never know. Why two black guys went to see Kramer do Stand-up I'll never know either. The two men exhibited poor judgement. Kramer's behavior is deplorable.
Jerry Seinfeld had Kramer appear on Letterman to apologize or whatever he could do to show remorse.
The two men got lawyers. They want an apology. I am going to assume monetary compensation since that is why one gets a lawyer. I don't know what they hope to achieve or believe they deserve.
An apology when you get a lawyer involved is meaningless. It has been forced. Michael Richards may be a good enough actor to make it believable, but no more sincere.
Will an apology make what he said disappear? Do these guys care what this jerk thinks anyways after this incident? Why wouldn't they want the whole thing to go away? What is their concept of justice?
Money. This must be the reason.Why?
Is it a First Amendment issue? You can't say nigger anymore? You definitely shouldn't, but can't.
Are people no longer allowed to be offended? Will law boil down to whim?
I use poor language too frequently and at the wrong times maybe, but should I be punished?
Why should someone's hurt feelings be a claim on your wealth? Will only rich people be able to afford to be offensive? Will poor people be jailed for being offensive?
My sympathy ends for those guys when they get a lawyer. There was no contract or law violated.
So they get $50,000? Are they going to buy a car? Then every time they go into their driveway they could say "there's the car I bought with the money I got from Kramer for calling me a nigger."
Some things are worth forgetting. I would think that this would be one of them. I also have not been told my whole life that I live in a racist country and people treat me differently for the color of my skin.

Saturdays as a Bartender

I have worked in bars for many years now. Mostly on weekends because that is where the money and work is. I am used to it.
However, there is always this limbo with my time between shifts. You can't do what everyone else is doing. Chances are, you will have to leave just as things are getting going. I usually end up on my couch going through a r.e.m. sleep of television and napping. There is nothing to watch. It seems the one good thing the television industry does is put horrible programming on Saturday afternoons so you have to get out and go do something. This does not help me.

Let's run down my Saturday options.

1)Go to a Bar and have a beer.
I just left a bar. I do not want to go near another drink until I am back at work.

2)Spend time with friends.
Sounds good. But most have already made their plans. They are going to San Fran. There is a wedding. There is a party I will leave early.

3) Go to the store and get some shopping done.
I tried this one time. the place was so full of other people and their families I left before I got what I wanted. Nothing but wall to wall noise. Not what I need between busy nights of the bar biz.

4) Relax with a book, movie, or video game.
What do you think I have been doing the rest of the week?

5)Get a Hobby
You're looking at it.

That beer sounds pretty good.

It is just beginning!

Day of Days!

Notable events at my Thanksgiving:

One guest drinking straight out of a bottle of Wild Turkey bourbon.

That same guest showing me dog hair on an hors d'ouevre cracker while I am eating said snacks.

That same guest opeing the faux champagne without a towel over the dining room floor.

Me not believing he wasn't invited somewhere else.

I do like this person, I just never knew how quickly his playfulness could become malevolent.

I had pretty good day, I went home after Spiderman 2 was over.

Here's what really gets me, those kids with bowl cuts who repeatedly show up in movies and television. Quick examples: Nicholas from Eight is Enough. Jonathan from Who's the Boss. Max from Liar, Liar. The boy twins from Full House. Oliver from The Brady Bunch.

What is so damn cute about these haircuts?

Why does this style defy the ages?

This toe head Beatles homage spans American entertainment history.

Can't children be cute in some other way? What am I missing? Bring back baseball hats jeans with a hole in the knee.

It's just as another example of adults using children as their pawns.

It's not quite as sick as using your child to block an abortion clinic or a human shield.

But sick like........ not getting any marketable skills of your own to earn a living besides forcing your kid to go from audition to audition.

I hope kid has more than a public record of cutesy haircuts when he turns 18.

Things I hope this kid doesn't have by his 21st year:

Alocoholism.

More illegitemate children than the L.A. Lakers.

Familiarity with more than 5 types of narcotics.

A rap sheet.

A guest spot on Ellen-Where have I been since Liar Liar?

A commercial for a chain of check cashing stores.

An inoperable tumor.

The need for serious life counseling.

A divorce.

A 3 digit bank account.

An offer to be in a porn movie.

What can I say?

The holidays make me a caring person.

Quick Holiday Post

It is Thanksgiving Day!
How do I know?
The Lions lost.
My hangover just went away.
There is no food around accept Thanksgiving dinner and I can't touch that until 5 o'clock.
Also, no one is on the net today, they are spending time with friends and family.
I will be too. However, I decided to blog everyday. (Like Pamela reminded me bloggers are supposed to do.) So here I am. I want to thank all of you for reading this or listening to my show. I am glad that I do something that provides interest and enjoyment to my friend and co-humans.
A special thank you to those who have especially made my life better this past year. Nina, Jane, Greg, Joel, Matt, Seano, and all my other close friends with whom I can talk.
This is as cheery as I get.
Now get eating!

Jefe

Enough Conspiracy Theories

Many an idiot has believed many ridiculous ideas in order to make some sense of the world. I have myself. No one is immune to ignorance. The surprising part is how many people indulge their ignorance. Instead of being angry, use your energy to find the truth. Some truths are evident. Lee Harvey Oswald shot JFK. Muslim Terrorists were behind 9-11. Accept it.
I know, people do things for money, like Halliburton. No-bid contracts are common for Defense Department work because we don't want our enemies to know all of our military expenditures. Think about it.
Let the internet that Shulda bin President Al Gore invented be a guide. If you can find wacko theories about fluoridation, you can know why polar ice caps calve.
There are some real phenomenon that need explaining. Start with a phone bill. Or how a phone works. These things are everywhere and no one can tell me how they work. I went to the library one time to find out, I couldn't find a decent book on the subject. Then I find Homeland Security was monitoring my account there. I mean c'mon. Have you heard about this Patriot Act. I though this was a free country.

Dreamblog

I have been thinking about blogging my dreams. They are quite odd and subject to many interpretations. I am not entirely sure that I want to share. But no one else that I know is doing it, so here goes.
Two nights ago I dreamed I was on another planet. I and a co-conspirator were on the run from authorities. The planet was all terraced waterfalls. There was a lot of swimming involved in running away. Besides the waterfalls, there were groves were you could hide under the trees so you could get way from the helicopters that were chasing us. Under the tree, their sensors couldn't locate you. We were hiding pretty good, but the guys in the helicopters started dropping friends of ours onto the ground to show they meant business. Then I woke up or I can't remember why it ended. Lots of my dreams involve being chased.
I had this one early this morning about two guys, one dressed as a priest and the other dressed in drag. They were either father and son or brothers and they were fighting about how they weren't accepting each other. Also they were rather short and looked like people who looked like Sharpeis.
I had a better dream after that but I can't remember right now. So I will tell you about my recurring dream.
I regularly have a dream where I am at college during exam week. It is very vivid, although the campus isn't always just like the University of Dayton, where I attended. In your face state school rabble.
I have either missed or cannot find my classroom, for between 1-3 classes. This is troubling, as I need 9 credits to graduate. For three months I haven't been going to class. I don't really know why. Sometimes it gets in depth, I have to plan how I will come back to finish the next semester. The dreams eerily imitate my life. Of course, going to class was never my problem, I liked my classes. It was writing papers I didn't much like. Too rigid to form. But I don't feel that way now. Although, I am partial to essays.
The other strange thing about the dream is that I DID FINISH COLLEGE. So there is obviously another unmet need in my life. I am not sure what that is yet.
We always have more to learn.

It's National Novel Writing Month

If you are interested, here's the link. It is a challenge. Not to write the Great American Novel, but a novel. It needn't be great or even American. Write about Mongols if you want. I'm doing it because I would like to say I have written a book before I die. Also, I can commit to a month.
What will it be about? Only I will know. But you can too! Just ask me for a chapter and it will be emailed as soon as I am able. Maybe, if you wan to help, send ideas to me, any and all will be included.

http://www.nanowrimo.org/